Etiquette

Today is Sunday, and as such I will spend most of my day in my local Southern Baptist Church. This morning was hard to wake up due the melody of falling rain on the roof. I go to the early service at 0830 hrs, then to Sunday School, and to the usual 1100 hrs service. We get a break for lunch and a Sunday nap, then right back to church at 1600 hrs.

However, during the Sunday School lesson we had a small aside about how when you are a Christian people watch you. They watch your reaction in the good times, in the bad, and how they will compare the two and bring it to your attention. This brought to mind something that happened on Friday after Court. To be precise it actually occured after lunch.

One of my fellow Agents on my Team (Agent B) asked if I could conduct a Home Visit with her. She said that she had gotten a community complaint and that we had to check it out.

During the drive to the house in question, she asked if Agent S had thanked me for all the work that we did on her Case load while she was out (the answer to this question is "yes", but that is not the point of her inquiry). At first I really was not sure how to answer (Agent B is not exactly known for playing well with her fellow Agents). After a few seconds of thinking about it I simply told her that I did not help Agent S out for a "Thank you." I helped her because the work had to be done and she had other things to worry about, like getting healthy. Besides it is just another part of the job.

She then told me that she agreed with that, "But, would not etiquette say that knowing how much hard work we put into helping her out, on top of our already increasing work load, would that not support saying a simple, Thank You." She then turned the situation around on me and asked if I was in the same situation, would I not say, "Thank You."

I told her that anytime I ask someone to help me out I say that, before, during, and after the particular circumstance (I think the actual words I used was "Grovel with Appreciation"). She then said then how should Agent S get away with not saying thank you.

At this point I had two choices 1) Drop the subject by saying nothing or by changing the subject, and hope that Agent B would just let the issue drop, or 2) Tell her what I really think about her stupid inquiry.

Agent B basically trained me, mentored me into this job, and having gotten to know her since, I knew that she would not let the issue drop with out an answer. One side of my personality desperately just wanted to avoid the issue, but I knew that I was caught and I had to choose my words carefully.

I told her in a stern tone of voice (I am relatively certain it is the tone I use with my offenders), "Under normal circumstances, etiquette would tell us to say thank you. However, due to the fact that 95 days ago Agent S was in a life changing car wreck, in which she came this close......to dying. Not to mention the fact that she spent several weeks in the hospital and cannot remember an entire month after the wreck. The fact that when she is at work, for all of four hours due to the pain, she has to get the same amount of work done that we get done in eight. Taking all of this into account I believe we can cut Agent S some slack in the etiquette department."

Now it was her turn to be silent for a second. When the answer came it did not surprise me, "Well, I still think she should say thanks." At this point I change the subject to the Home Visit and what we needed to be concentrating on.

At the time the conversation took place, I believed this inquirey was simply to cause trouble. Now, I am not so sure. Coupled with the fact that Agent B has said on several different occasions that she "Loves" to see me fail and this mornings Sunday School lesson, I now believe this to have been a test. I am not sure if I passed or failed, but I know one thing, I get tested enough by my Offenders and do not need more tests coming from what I consider "Family."

Semper Fi Deus
Goose